This post is all about postpartum mental health.
Postpartum mental health can be overlooked when you are busy taking care of a newborn. But the truth is, postpartum emotions are a very real and common occurrence among new moms, whether it is your first baby or a second. But what can you do to help manage them?
In this post you will learn all about possible postpartum emotions including the difference between the baby blues, postpartum anxiety and postpartum depression.
In addition, this post addresses common postpartum mental health struggles new moms go through as well as practical postpartum mental health tips you can start implementing.
Postpartum Mental Health After Having A Baby
Being a newly postpartum mom comes with every emotion you can possibly imagine: love for your new baby, happiness, exhaustion, overwhelm, and at times even sadness.
The truth is, it’s normal to feel anxious as you adjust to your new role as mom and the world around you seems to change overnight but it’s also important to know what postpartum warning signs to look out for in case there is something more serious going on like postpartum anxiety or postpartum depression.
So what’s the difference between baby blues vs. postpartum anxiety vs. postpartum depression?
Baby Blues
The baby blues describes the short period of time (~2 weeks) following your child’s birth where you may feel sad, worried, irritable, moody, overwhelmed, trapped and may cry a lot.
It is triggered by the physical and emotional changes following birth as well as the plummeting of levels of estrogen and progesterone which were high during pregnancy.
The baby blues affect up to 80% of mothers but usually goes away on its own within a few weeks.
Postpartum Anxiety
Postpartum anxiety (PPA) takes the baby blues a step further. Being a new mom can be stressful but those with postpartum anxiety usually have overwhelming, irrational worry that does not go away on its own after a few weeks like the baby blues. It takes new mom concerns but makes them feel more extreme and persistent.
Some of the factors that can influence a mom to experience postpartum anxiety are the hormonal shifts after giving birth, sleep deprivation, lifestyle or relationship changes post birth, societal pressures on new moms to be “perfect”, having a history of anxiety, having a premature baby, or previous experience with a miscarriage.
Signs of Postpartum Anxiety:
- Constant worry that is hard to forget about
- Feelings of dread or excessive worry that something bad will happen to the baby
- Overwhelming sense of burden, stress or concern
- Difficulty sleeping (even when baby is sleeping)
- Racing thoughts
- Nausea
- Shaking or trembling
- Hyperventilation
- Elevated heartbeat, rapid breathing and/or panic attacks
Postpartum anxiety does not last forever but I encourage you to reach out to your doctor at the first signs of extreme worry or if you are experiencing any of the symptoms listed above.
Postpartum Depression
Postpartum depression (PPD) is a more serious condition that many women experience during the first year after giving birth.
Having a baby is a major, life-changing event but for some women, profound feelings of sadness, overwhelm and a lack of interest in the baby or life in general persist.
Signs of Postpartum Depression:
- Crying
- Insomnia or wanting to sleep all day
- Extremes of eating – loss of appetite or wanting to eat everything
- Intense irritability
- Difficulty bonding with baby
- Severe anxiety
- Loss of interest in doing things you used to love
- Excessive worry about your baby’s health
- Inability to care for yourself or your baby
- Little interest in or negative thoughts towards your baby
- Fear of being alone with your baby
- Social isolation
- Persistent feelings of sadness, hopelessness or helplessness
Postpartum depression typically lasts for several weeks, months or even a year and usually requires prompt treatment to help manage symptoms.
A mother with postpartum depression may feel embarrassed or ashamed about not being perfectly happy after having a baby or feel that others would judge her if they knew all the struggles she was going through behind closed doors.
Common Postpartum Mental Health Struggles
- Not getting enough sleep, accepting it and feeling like you will never sleep again.
- Mom guilt over EVERYTHING – taking time away for self care, feeling like you need a break, regret towards becoming a parent,
- Raging hormones that lead to a wide range of emotions (anger, sadness, guilt, etc), hair loss, and change in appetite.
- Feeling like you are not a good enough mom
- Obsessing over your baby’s sleep or eating
- Separation anxiety and the toll it takes/what it looks like
- Feeling overwhelmed by the newborn stage and wanting to figure it all out at once.
- Not knowing the difference between the baby blues vs. postpartum anxiety vs. postpartum depression
Top Tips For Postpartum Mental Health
1. Give yourself grace.
There’s a reason that this is my #1 postpartum mental health tip and that’s because it is easily the most important in my opinion. With parenthood comes good days, bad days, tired days and everything in between. This is a brand new season of life that you haven’t experienced yet (even if you’re going from one to two kids) so take a breath and give yourself grace.
2. Advocate for yourself and let your support system know you need help.
It’s easy to get caught up in the baby’s needs but your needs are important too! It can be hard for others to recognize that you need help so it is your job to speak up and ask for help. It can be hard at first but once you get used to it, it can make a big difference.
3. Understand that postpartum anxiety and postpartum depression are more common than you think.
It’s sometimes not talked about enough but many moms struggle with some sort of postpartum mental health issues. It’s easy to look at social media and the highlight reel but behind the smiling faces can be postpartum anxiety, postpartum depression or other issues.
4. Know that you are not alone.
Your postpartum mental health is so important and a crucial part of it is knowing you are not alone in new motherhood and all that comes with it. Which brings me to postpartum mental health tip #5…
5. Take care of yourself.
Shower daily, change into new clothes and make sure you are eating too. It can be so hard to remember to take care of yourself while you are feeding/changing/soothing a newborn but it is sooo important that you take care of you too.
6. Talk to other mom friends.
Other moms are some of the best people to talk to because they totally get it. They have been through the sleepless nights, endless diaper changes and constant feedings but they also know how amazing it is once you get through all that.
7. Create a new “schedule” that works for YOU.
This is particularly important during your maternity leave. It can be easy to stay in pajamas all day but it is good to have a flexible schedule to give you purpose in each day.
8. Unfollow accounts on social media that don’t make you feel your best.
Social media can be a tricky place, especially when you are emotionally vulnerable. Whether people mean to or not, it tends to become a highlight reel where moms love to share their child’s wins and their own advice. There is a time and a place for the advice but don’t let anyone make you feel less than so go block happy for as long as you need to.
9. Get some fresh air with your baby.
This could be to go for a walk, run an errand or simply go for a drive. It can be really scary to go out with your baby alone but not only is it refreshing to leave your house but it also builds confidence within you when you successfully run an errand with your baby.
10. Understand no two kids are the same.
Playing the comparison game won’t do you any good. Instead, focus on you and your baby and block the rest of the world out. Sure there are average timelines for when babies should hit certain milestones but each baby is unique and will crawl, eat, talk on their own timeline.
11. Let go of “rules” and do what is best for you.
Everyone and their mother have advice and tips but at the end of the day, you have to do what’s best for you and your family. If that means a little screen time while you cook dinner or a later bedtime so you can have family time, it’s worth it if it means something to you.
12. Create safe zones for babies/toddlers.
Sometimes moms just need a minute to compose themself or go to the bathroom. Gates, cribs/pack n plays or bassinets are great options!
13. Pick only one to two chores for the day
Do what you can and don’t overdo it. Those newborn snuggles are important and the dishes, laundry, sweeping can wait.
14. Use store pickup or delivery when possible.
Target drive up and grocery store pick up should be your BFF and makes life sooo much easier some days so don’t shy away from it.
15. Keep a running list of to do’s in the notes app on your phone.
This is the perfect way to keep track of all the ideas and to do’s floating through your head. The newborn fog is just as bad (maybe even worse) than pregnancy brain because you’re working on such little sleep so this is a game changer for actually remembering things hours later.
16. Read up on postpartum mental health.
Educating yourself on the baby blues, postpartum anxiety and postpartum as well as encouraging your significant other to do the same can be very beneficial, especially in identifying the signs for these postpartum mental health issues. Many times, it takes you speaking up to get the help you need.
17. See a therapist.
This can be incredibly helpful, especially if you are dealing with postpartum anxiety and postpartum depression. There are therapists out there who specifically work with postpartum women and really understand what moms are going through. Your OBGYN should be able to give you a few recommendations of therapists near you.
This post is all about postpartum mental health.